At 23 years old, I often feel like I should have more of a purpose, direction, or plan. I know that 23 is still pretty young, but it won’t last forever, and there’s still so much I want to do. I’ve touched on this theme before, but it’s weighing on my mind again.
I work full time. I don’t love it, but I don’t hate it (usually). I took a break from theater to get my house in order, and it will get there, slowly but surely. But I feel like there’s so much to do in my LIFE and I don’t know when to do it all.
Here’s some of what I want to do:
- Go back to school and get some kind of degree in something!
- Get married
- Have or adopt kids
- Find a job that I love
- Move somewhere new
I have long wanted to work in events. I love acting, but I don’t think that’s where I’m meant to make a living! I love photography, but I don’t know enough to work in that field (yet). Events (or public relations, marketing, etc) seem like the perfect place for me to use my creative AND practical sides. It just so happens that David’s sister feels the same way. In fact, she recently got a great job working events. We have talked a lot about opening our own event-planning business, and I really love the idea.
I would like to at least get my associates degree (if my past credits transfer, it wouldn’t take THAT long) in business. It seems like the program at MATC has a lot of practical courses on starting your own business. That would help both of us out.
The big time thing to me is kids. I think I want them. I’m 99.9999% sure I do. I think David is almost as sure as I am. I don’t know if I want to have my own or adopt. Either way, 30 seems like a deadline there. Sure, I could probably push it to 35 for bio kids. Could I adopt up to 40? Probably, but I don’t know that I’d want to. 30 seems like a good time. Not too old, not too young. I want to be able to keep up with a baby or two! Plus, I’m too selfish with my time right now to even have PETS, let alone kids!!
The “problem” I run into while trying to think about where my life is going and what I should be planning for, is that there are SO many things I want to do before I have kids!!
My degree should definitely be done before kids. I will obviously be married before having kids.
David and I have talked a lot about picking up and moving somewhere. Just for the heck of it! To experience a new city, to start a life together, to get out there and try something new, to go on an adventure! We’ve done a lot of casual browsing, taking “Where Should I Live” quizzes, etc. We’ve thought of Portland OR, Richmond VA, Baltimore MD, and many others. We like the feel of Milwaukee, but want something a little different. Of course, my dream is Chicago or New York, but David doesn’t like the thought of living in those places.
My current obsession is Lexington or Louisville KY. I know, I know… Kentucky??? What am I thinking? Well, my dad recently came back from a road trip where he visited some friends in Louisville. He could not stop raving about how nice of a city it is. He literally said “I want to move there!” I could barely take him seriously. I mean, it’s Kentucky! But after seeing pictures and browsing the Wikipedia and Craigslist pages, it doesn’t look that bad. They’re on a similar scale as Milwaukee. They’re not TOO far from home (Lexington is about 8 hours from Milwaukee). They are affordable and plenty of major corporations call one of those cities home. They’re safe. They have tons of art and history and culture. They both have summer festivals. And lots of theater. They look pretty good! Don’t believe me? Read their Wikipedia pages (linked above).
Ideally, we’d like to try out a new city for maybe a year or two. If we like it, we stay. If not, we move back to Milwaukee. I want to do this before we have kids for many reasons. But after we’re married. But then what does that say for the hopes of an event planning businesss?
I was thinking about going back to school in the fall. But how will that affect my debt-free goal? They say that student-loan debt is “good debt” and hopefully with a degree, I’d be able to get a job that pays more than my current one. But still. I am really against owing ANYTHING right now, and I don’t want to think about making more payments to anyone.
Also, how am I supposed to justify saving up buttloads of money for a wedding, when that money COULD be going to student loans? Argghh!
If money didn’t get in the way, I’d go back to school in the fall. At most, I’d be done in two years. At that point I’d get or be married. We’d take a kick-ass honeymoon somewhere exotic. Then we’d look for a job in the city of our choice, and move there for about two years. At this point it would be 2012 and I would be around 28. Perfect time to settle down in Milwaukee and do the kid-thing (close to family aka built-in-babysitters). Having kids seems like the ideal time to kick start a home business.
Even if I don’t start that plan for another year, to save money, or what not, I’ll be around 29 when I’m ready for settling down/kid time. That’s not too bad. I’ve thought that my life might be over once I have kids, but I don’t think that has to be the case. I’m sure my mom or David’s sister would be willing to baby sit while we went on vacation. And when they’re older, they could come along.
This is all pretty overwhelming. I like to live in the moment and be spontaneous. I don’t want to plan everything out. But I also don’t want to turn 30 and feel trapped or feel like I didn’t do anything with my young years or like my dreams of adventure can’t be achieved.